Dear Rina Column
During the pandemic, her work shifted to helping people manage their lives and choices better by giving them guidance and helping them think through their challenges in different ways. Here’s some testimonials to see how helpful her advice has been for others. Perhaps, she can help you too! Please email [email protected] or DM her on iG via @rinayoga if you want your question(s) answered.
How do I feel sexy again and regain my confidence after a breakup? What are some practices you can share?
Rebuilding in Ft. Lauderdale
Dear Rebuilding in Ft. Lauderdale,
Your sexiness and confidence should never have been placed on a relationship or a partner. So regardless of whether you’re single or not, your sexiness and confidence ideally is alive and pumping! 🙂 Buuut, since we are learning how to do this in reference to a fresh break-up, our first thing to keep in perspective is that this break-up is for the best. I know it’s hard to live this way because we are attached and feel so many emotions. Take it one day at a time. When you are not attached, you can move freely and lovingly. Plus of course, you can see and understand clearly. A mental practice for you: As soon as an emotion pops up, just observe your emotion and say “Hello (insert emotion). You can pass by, but not stay.” Don’t get caught up in the emotion. Don’t look at old pictures, social media, emails, texts etc. Place your worth on yourself and not on your partner. Follow up your “Hello…” with a positive affirmation. For example, “I am already full on my own.” A Physical Practice for you: Masturbate thinking of yourself. Turn yourself on by yourself. Don’t think of anyone else. Make yourself the sexiest mofo alive in your eyes!” Yaaaaas Queen!
How do I initiate sex without feeling silly and uncomfortable?
Love,
Shy in Los Angeles
Dear Shy in Los Angeles,
A sensual woman never feels uncomfortable or silly asking for what she needs and wants. In fact, she’s empowered by it. Not because she’s going to get what she wants, but because she’s empowered by voicing her truth. Consider how you’d like to be approached when your partner wants to initiate sex. Playful yet assertive is sexy. So step up and act that way with them too. Especially since men tend to be visual so if you’re awkward and uncomfortable, they won’t register that as a sexy initiation. Depending on your relationship, you could voice your discomfort if you feel your partner will receive it respectfully and do what they can to make you feel safer and more comfortable. The way to get over it at first is to fake it until you make it… pretend you’re comfortable and confident and eventually you will be. You got this!
